"asyhaduallahillahaillah..." mr Asnan & Datok Rahim mengucap.

uncertain about the spelling, but both of them were mengucap-ing. it hurts to see him breathing in and out with so much difficulty. it hurts to see him struggling to speak. it hurts to see him say that he's weary after breathing through the oxygen mask for long hours. it hurts seeing him sweating.it hurts to see him suffer. it hurts to see other patient's heartbeat so constant while his one is so you-know. it hurts to hear him mengucap desperately with my father. my father touched his forehead and peacefully berzikir to his ears. me and my sister could afford to shed tears.

i had been so selfish. i cant believe i did. my loving grandpa had been so sick for the past few weeks. i,being so selfish,reluctant to visit him because i tot it was his normal sickness. until yest,while i was revising,something distracted me.i somehow have this extra sense. ok no firi no. me and my father rushed to tantockseng hosp at 11pm when he was admitted to icu.

everyone was there.my mother had been so stress because of her loving father's condition.while waiting,my mind flashbacked to the times he always buy ice-cream and sweets for us.you know every children's like.he loves every of his grandchildren,like we do.

he used to take care of me and bro while my parents are out werkin. there,he and my grandma showered their love to us.we were so close during our childhood years.it all changed eversince we stepped on our teenage years and he seperated from my grandma.

all that could only remain as memories. it feels like the memories were fresh and so yesterday.so yesterday,so yesterdayy.i skipped school 2day because we went home really late and wasnt in e mood for school at all.

this morning we woke up,we claimed we had dreams of our grandpa.weird.i have to accept that if he has to go,he has to go den.ajal maut di tangan Tuhan.it had been rough for me.

oh boy.this is the emo-est entry i ever post.so yeah,i will never touch a cigarrete in my whole life. but worst lah because im a second-hand smoker.ive to bear with e consequences thennn.

so people,update me what went on during skewl 2day.im bored.2nite,there's a lot of dramas not to be missed. ok no,just two of them.but gerek u noe! so,ill be back and post more lively entries.

ok toodles now. u may notice the change of my layout which is more pathetic. so ive a chatterbox. you ppl can go and chatter now. bye now.